Parenting Tip - Strengthening our Kids for the Last Days

This is a great video that gives practical advice to parents who are raising children now.  And preparing them for the future.

Where are you spending your time?  Where are your children spending their time?  Too many activities?  Not the BEST activities for this crucial time in their lives?

How can you get protection for your children?  How can you open the other POWERS that are available?  How can you access the "other side" of the veil to strengthen and help you.

How can you utilize the Sabbath Day?

Great insights and support and help for parents in this, the last days, as we prepare our children to usher in the coming of the Lord.

Thanks for reading--and viewing,

Cathy

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Parenting Tip - You are Brave!

A young mom was talking to her single brother who had just sailed around the world on a sailboat by himself.  She told him how brave she thought he was but he said, "Yeah, that's what everyone tells me, but it's YOU that's brave.  It doesn't take bravery to sail around the world, just organization and a boat,  You are the brave one.  You work through problems in your marriage and don't give up and walk away. You teach your children continuously even when you don't think they're paying any attention to you.  What you are doing takes bravery!"

Here's what the dictionary says:
          noun: bravery

courageous behavior or character.
Synonyms:
courage, valor, intrepidity, nerve, daring, fearlessness, audacity, boldness, dauntlessness, stoutheartedness, heroism;  backbone, grit, true grit, pluck, spine, spirit,mettle; spunk

"the bravery witnessed here today will never be forgotten" 

courage, valor, intrepidity, nerve, daring, fearlessness, audacity, boldness,dauntlessness, stoutheartedness, heroism; 

backbone, grit, true grit, pluck, spine, spirit,mettle;  spunk

"the bravery witnessed here today will never be forgotten"

Well, yeah, that describes marriage, parenthood and life in general!  I immediately think of potty training with the adjectives "courageous behavior, nerve and fearlessness."

You will need lots of brave moments during parenthood.  Here are some situations that come readily to mind:
*  Teaching your 15 year old how to drive takes intrepidity and nerve.
*  Sending your first child off to kindergarten requires courage and valor.
*  Changing your baby's poopy diaper that he has taken off and finger painted his crib with, needs daring and grit, not to mention stoutheartedness
*  Inviting 10 giggly girls to your house for your daughter's birthday party will take fearlessness and dauntlessness.
*  Buying two dozen cookies for your child's Halloween party at school, then going back to the store to buy a poster board for your jr high school daughter's science project due tomorrow plus taking in dinner to a neighbor with a new baby requires pluck, spine and dauntlessness.

The sentence that the dictionary supplied "the bravery witnessed here today will never be forgotten" could be paired with so many scenarios.

Mom, age 34, just finished mopping the floor, only to have muddy footprints tracked across it by her 3 and 5 year old sons who have been outside playing in the mud from the recent rain storm. Mom  bit her tongue and refrained from screaming, yelling and throwing things.
The bravery witnessed here today will never be forgotten.
or
Dad, age 40, walks in the door from a tiring day at work to find two sick children who have both just upchucked all over the new couch and carpet.  Upon looking for his wife, he finds her sick in bed doing the same thing. Dad cleans up the messes, opens a can of chicken noodle soup for dinner, washes the dishes and tells his wife he will take off work tomorrow.  
The bravery witnessed here today will never be forgotten.

It takes courageous behavior--bravery--to be a parent who is on call 24/7, rain or shine, day or night, feeling healthy or not.  It takes bravery to even bring children into this world with all its skewed sense of right and wrong and what is important in life.  It takes bravery plus faith and hope to go through each day with all its myriad challenges and expectations. It takes bravery to be a stay at home mom, fighting boredom, repetitiveness and un-appreciation from your family.  And it takes bravery to leave your children every day to go to work because it's what you have to do.
 
But you know what? The bravery witnessed every day by what you do will never be forgotten. Not by God who loves you, or eventually by your children and husband nor even by you, now that you know how BRAVE you are.

So stand a little taller.
                      Smile a little longer.
                                                And get out there again and do it.  Because:

Thanks for reading, 

Cathy

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Parenting Tip - Parenting Teenagers

 You may have already seen or heard about Josh Shipp.  I just listened to one of his videos that was posted on Facebook--the place I see all the upcoming news and info.  I liked what I heard. He is being called the "teen whisperer".   He speaks common sense and comes from a background of being a troubled youth himself.

As my husband and I parented our children through their teen years, I always remembered what my mother said when she had 4 teenagers growing up in our home at the same time-- myself, my sister and two brothers.  She said,  "I loved having you all as teenagers.  You were the best kids, and it was so fun to be around you." 

Now that's NOT what the majority of parents would say.  And I don't think my siblings and I were perfect or abnormal.  But my parents had taught us to be respectful, honest, have faith in God and know that we were children of God and that He had a plan for our lives.  We did experience ups and downs and normal teenage disagreements with our parents, but we respected each other, listened to advice from our parents and more importantly, they listened to us.  We cooperated together, we supported each other and we loved each other and had fun together.

When I had my teenagers, I experienced the same thing.  They were good kids.  They were funny, respectful, hardworking, compassionate, and good students.  They knew God loved them and had a purpose for their lives.  We were blessed with children that would listen to us and honor our decisions. 

We were firm and a lot more strict than other parents.  I know, because they told me--often.  But all seven children have also told me later as adults, that they were glad we were so strict.  They were glad they had boundaries and limitations.

Teenagers have a lot of peer pressure to deal with.  But so do YOU as parents.  Don't cave into your peer pressure, Moms and Dads.  Don't go with the flow and let your children go and do what others are doing, just because it is easier and your adult friends are letting their children do things you feel uncomfortable with.  Have rules in your home.  Let your family set those rules and help everyone to understand why the rule is as it is.

If your teen is having mental health problems, medical problems or acting different, get help--don't let it slide until the problem is worse.

But most importantly, ENJOY your teenagers! 

Parenting Tip - 3 Cheers for Cub Scout "Moms"!

I have 4 boys, but have never worked in cub scouts, even though all my boys attended and advanced in scouting.  I was always the Mom who was asked to volunteer to work with the children’s music programs.  My mother was a Den Leader when she was in her 60’s and truly loved it.  I think maybe I missed out on something.  Maybe with my grandsons I’ll be able to help in the cub scouting program.

A friend of mine, Alyson Gardner,  has worked extensively in our local cub scouting program.  I’m amazed at her enthusiasm and love for the boys and for scouts.  Here are her words:

“I love working in Cub Scouts!  Cub Scouts is one of the times when I can truly enjoy everything good about a boy being "all boy."  Sometimes at church I might be quick to notice the boys' irreverent behaviors such as wiggling in their seats, shouting out answers or poking their neighbor.  At cub scouts I notice these same behaviors but in a different light. Suddenly, that restless boy is a fast runner or good at basketball.  Or the loud boy becomes the inquisitive boy that wants to understand the what and how of a science experiment.  And the rowdy boy discovers he makes a great bear when performing in the den skit.  Cub Scouting is a wonderful opportunity for boys to discover hidden talents, develop confidence in themselves and have fun!

One of my favorite things to do as a Den Leader is to go into the home of a boy who is about to turn of age and join my den.  I sit down with him and his parents.  I explain the ins and outs of cub scouting including the reasons we wear a uniform.  Often I'll help him pass off a simple requirement or two.  We talk about what he can expect from me his leader - a fun, productive and safe learning environment and what I will expect of him - a good attitude, coming prepared and treating others with respect. The best part is that while I'm making myself familiar to the boy and getting to know him a little better, I'm also spreading enthusiasm for cub scouts.  I've found that when I take the time to hold this personal meeting, that the boy is more excited to come to den meetings each week and his parents are more committed to helping him.  I feel that when I sacrifice a little of my time I send the big message that "You're important and I care about you."

Some of my best learning moments with the boys have been when we are working on the religious knots.  My all time favorite was with a group of 8 year olds.  We were discussing the principle of faith and sharing stories from the scriptures of people who had faith.  We began our den meeting by doing some fun hands on activities that demonstrated aspects of faith such as hope, courage and trust.  Then we broke into two groups and each boy chose one story of faith.  They studied it and then shared it with the group asking specific questions and ended by bearing their testimonies.  It was an amazing experience to have the boys go from laughing and playing as they practiced having faith, to bearing their personal witness of our Savior Jesus Christ.  As they bore their testimonies, it was a silent audience.  

Always remember that we do it for "the one."  My first year as a Webelos leader I only had 2-3 boys.  Occasionally, because of conflicts in some of the boys' schedules, only one boy would show up.  How easy it would have been to justify cancelling cub scouts by telling myself that it was an awful lot of work for just one boy.  But I didn't.  Instead, my assistant and I would present the material and have that one boy do the requirements.  This young man earned his Webelos and Arrow of Light ranks and continued on into Boy Scouts. Eventually, through his experiences in scouting he earned his Eagle.  I had nothing to do with him earning his Eagle, but maybe my small act of holding consistent den meetings and having a genuine interest in his success, helped him along the road.

And then there was Danny (name changed).  He acted up in church and so the other children avoided him.  I wasn't his den leader but I knew him because he was in our pack.  I tried to say hello and visit with him when I saw him at church, school or pack meetings.  There wasn't much I could do to help him have friends, but I could try to help him feel loved.  I tried to notice every time he did something nice or "good," no matter however small and compliment him on it.  He didn't have a uniform so I found one to give him.  I remember how happy he looked at pack meetings to be wearing a uniform like the other boys.  I was his sub in his church classes several times.  He always had behavior issues, but I noticed that he was quick to respond to my correction. I think that was because he knew that I loved him.  He felt safe.

I would love for every cub scout leader to realize the importance of his/her calling.  I feel sad when I hear leaders say, "I'm stuck in cub scouting," as if they've been put in exile.  I worry that they feel their position is insignificant when in reality it has the potential to change the lives of boys.”

Wow!  There is a mother who in actuality is a mother to many other children—all boys!  The world is a better place with moms like her who see great potential in rowdy little boys and help them grow into responsible young men.  

Thanks for reading,

Cathy

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Music Tip - The Triangle

I just received a nice comment from one of my subscribers (thank you Master P), so I decided to check out a couple of her blogs.  Since she is a musician and teacher, one of her blogs is about helping her own children practice and ideas on how to motivate them.  Today she posted a "scathingly brilliant" (know what movie that is from?  Anne of Green Gables, I love that phrase!), idea for practicing and a very sound learning principle behind the idea.

I don't want to take away her thunder, so you'll have to check it out, here.  It is a very true principle.
Also scroll down and read the idea about chocolate chips practicing.

Now here comes the point to my post today.  I, as a piano teacher, feel like my job is to teach, encourage and motivate my students to practice.  I enjoy doing that, in fact.  

BUT....I'm not the reason your child will learn to play the piano; it will take a triangle for this to happen--- Me--the teacher, you--the parent, and your child--the student.  Together we can create a musician.

You--the parent, are VITAL to this triangle.  You can't just "wish" your child to play the piano.  You can't even just "pay for piano lessons" and have your child learn to play the piano.  YOUR CHILD HAS TO PRACTICE THE PIANO. 

 




You--as the parent, have to provide enough time in the day for your child to practice. That sounds simple, but read that statement again.  

t h e r e  h a s  t o  b e  time  t o  p r a c t i c e. 
Think about it.

You--as the parent, have to help motivate your child to practice.  You have to be involved.  You can't just provide piano lessons, you have to help make learning it, happen.

So, there you have it.  Me.  You.  Your child.

It's a journey all 3 of us are on together.  Let's have fun on the journey!  Let's be creative!  Let's enjoy it---cause let me tell you, music is a gift from God, and it is one of the most beautiful gifts He has given us.  

Let us say, "thank you" by using this beautiful power to enrich and bless our lives.

Thanks for reading,
Cathy

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Parenting Tip - An Amazing Mother

Aubrey Kleinschmidt is a wife and mother of four children under the age of 6; Tyler 6 years old, Emma 5, Jacob 2 and Gracie 8 months old.   Aubrey is blind.

Aubrey lost the sight in her left eye when she was only 4 days old.   She considered her vision in her right eye to be normal and did not consider herself to be visually impaired. Her sight limitations weren’t really noted until she was working at a dry cleaners. She had trouble matching customer tickets with their dry cleaning items because she kept reversing numbers. The owner of the cleaners suggested she might be dyslexic. She was tested as a senior in high school and found to be visually impaired. She qualified for an Individual Education Plan and went to Berkley, California (an assisted living program) for vocational rehab where she had an opportunity to learn Braille and life skills related to functioning as a blind person. It was assumed that she would lose sight in her right eye.  Aubrey says that she did not take the program very seriously. She met Michael, her future husband, while living in Berkley. 
Aubrey and Michael married and began their family.   Aubrey's pregnancies, however, were stressful for the fragile retina of her right eye. Her vision began to wane after Emma was born. Despite repeated attempts to salvage the sight in her right eye – Aubrey was told, almost three years ago, that she was considered "stone blind" (totally blind).  Shortly after this news, she discovered that she was pregnant with Jacob.

Aubrey attended classes for the blind for over a year. She was taught life skills/mobility skills and Braille, etc. She has special equipment that helps her to read printed text and a very smart phone.

Since Aubrey knew that she would never visually see Jacob’s face she made a special effort to find a doctor that would let her assist with her own delivery. She had the amazing opportunity to help bring Jacob into this world. He has a very special spirit and was a very calm and easy baby to care for.

Despite the loss of her sight, Aubrey and Michael felt there was still a baby waiting to come to their family.  In 2013 she had another special opportunity to help bring Gracie into this world. Gracie has also been an amazingly calm and easy baby to care for.

  Aubrey was born in Salt Lake City, Utah on January 4, 1983.   She was delivered at 28 weeks and weighed 2 lbs, 2 ounces.  The doctor didn’t think she would make it through the night and her mom was told not to even bother to name her! Retinopathy of prematurity (ROM) was the  cause of damage to her eyes.

 

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 Aubrey cooks, cleans, helps with homework and stays on top of the myriad of details sighted moms have to contend with. She is an amazing mom. She doesn’t see with her eyes. She sees with her heart.

Despite the devastating news of losing her sight, Aubrey was not one to wallow in self-pity.  She says her vision loss has improved her marriage and strengthened her testimony of God. She says it has made her a better mother.  When Tyler or Emma say, “Look what I’ve made," Aubrey can’t just glance over and then get back to whatever she was doing.  She stops and goes over to the child and feels with her hands what they have made. When she interacts with her children she is down on the floor playing with them in ways other mothers might skip.

Aubrey is especially grateful for the tremendous support Michael has been for her since she lost her sight. He has been her rock and comfort in difficult times. His flexible work hours have allowed him to drop everything and attend to her needs when necessary. 

Aubrey has a few tricks she and Michael have developed to keep on top of things at home:

- safety pins in all the girls clothing to tell them from the boys.

- puff paint Braille dots on the stove, microwave and washer where the instruction words are.

- always keeps spatula handle aligned with skillet handle so she knows where it's at.

- Tyler's school teacher puts a staple in the top right hand corner of school papers that need parental attention.

- if the TV is on, Aubrey can judge when she is walking in a straight line away from the sound or moving diagonally away from the TV

-Children's shoes are velcroed together and kept on a shelf.

- Aubrey has the chocolate chip cookie recipe memorized!

-Aubrey holds the baby in front of her with her elbow touching the wall as she walks down the hall and the other hand is in front of baby's face (she's bumped the baby into things before)

-Aubrey is constantly feeling her preschooler and baby's faces for smiles, running noses,or  objects in mouth that shouldn't be.

-Aubrey crawls above her baby and explores the floor with her.

-if Aubrey needs to find her younger children she'll call their name and instruct, "say moma" so she can hear where they are.

- Aubrey feeds baby food to her baby by cutting the top off the nipple to make the hole bigger.

-Aubrey is reading Harry Potter to her children with a braille copy of the book. 

Aubrey understandably has her down days.  Life is hard for a mother with sight, and especially hard without sight.  6 year old Tyler spells out the instructions for his homework, letter by letter so Aubrey can know what he is to do.  By the time he finishes, he and his mother are both mentally exhausted before they even get to the homework.

Aubrey has an amazing outlook and attitude about her life. She states that her problems in life are not due to her blindness.  She understands that her vision loss does not affect her ability to progress in life. She does not use her blindness as an excuse for not being the best person that she can be. 

Aubrey "sees" what is important in life!

Thanks for reading,

Cathy

 Thanks to Cathy Rogers for help in writing this post.

This post was published on the Arizona American Mothers blog  

and pending being published on the National American Mothers blog.

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Parenting Tip - We are Mothers!

When I was pregnant with my 5^th child, I was embarrassed to tell my neighbors or even go grocery shopping. I dreaded getting those looks that said, “What? Do you think you have to populate the whole world yourself?” Or worse still, the people who made snide little comments like, “Are all those your children,” then walked away muttering, “doesn't she know about birth control?”

But I loved children and my husband and I wanted another baby. We both were raised in large families and saw the benefits of having lots of siblings, and we wanted a large family ourselves. But did I really? It was hard enough raising four children without adding another. I decided, yes, I did want another child. But I also decided that if I loved having a large family, I needed to start noticing the joy my children gave me, so I started a “Joy Journal”. In this journal I recorded little things that happened during the day that gave me joy. I didn't want this to become a burden or another failure attempt, so I didn't record things every day, just whenever I noticed something special.

My Joy Journal became a wonderful blessing in the life of my family. At birthdays I would read from my journal about the things the birthday child had done during that year that brought me joy and this became a special part of their birthday.

Every family is different. Some mothers who only have one or two children wish they could have more. Some are very happy to have just the amount they have. But as mothers, regardless of the number of children we have, we should never be embarrassed to BE MOTHERS.

With permission, I quote from an article I recently read (Ensign Oct. 2013, 60) of an experience that happened to the author, Craig Cardon's, wife. It took place when they attended a dinner for members of the Dean’s Alumni Leadership Council at the Harvard Kennedy School several years ago.

“After the dinner the president of the council invited the council members and their companions to stand and introduce themselves. He suggested that each person share educational and professional background information, along with what each considered to be his or her most significant accomplishment. Because of the way the room was organized, our table would be the last to participate.

[My wife} later explained to me that as she saw all in attendance standing and listing their many academic degrees and professional accomplishments, she thought, “What can I possibly say to these people who have been ambassadors, high government officials, educators, professionals, and leaders of gigantic enterprises? I don’t even have my bachelor’s degree yet” (though she subsequently received it in 2008).

[My wife’s} mind continued racing: “I’ve got to think of something to say. No, I’ve got to find an excuse to leave.” Then, in an instant, she thought, “I’m going to pray.”

She said a silent, earnest prayer, pleading with the Lord for His help and direction. In that moment, a voice came into her mind with perfect clarity. It said, “Debbie, who in this room has achieved more important things in this life or has had more amazing experiences than you? You are a mother in Zion. You have brought eight children into this world. Those who are of age are happily married and are having children of their own. What is more important than that? Debbie, get up and tell these people with power what you have done.”

At that moment, the microphone was passed to our table. I had seen [Debbie] shifting in her chair and looking a bit uneasy, so I extended my hand to take the microphone, thinking to give her additional time to prepare herself. Imagine my surprise when her hand stretched out in front of mine and literally grabbed the microphone.

She confidently stood, and with an elegance difficult to describe, she said, “A few years ago I accompanied my husband here to the Harvard Kennedy School. And my most important achievement is that I am the mother of 8 children and the grandmother of 18 grandchildren” (the number of grandchildren at the time).

With that statement, spontaneous applause erupted in the room. It was the only applause of the entire evening. [Debbie] shared a few additional thoughts relating to the central, societal role of the family and the happiness found therein. Then she handed me the microphone and sat down. I stood and added simply, “I’m her husband.”

We are mothers. We love, teach, and nurture our children into responsible adults. We cry with our children, cry over our children, and cry about our children. We laugh with our children, laugh about our children, and cry when they're gone. We teach with our words, teach by example, and pray that our teaching will become internalized. We have an important job! Let us never be embarrassed to proudly say, we are mothers!

Thanks for reading,

Cathy

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Parenting Tip - Housework Scavenger Hunt

 Summer is here for lots of you moms out there.  Now is the time to get some strategies going so that you have a successful and happy summer.  My daughter just emailed what she was doing today and I thought I should share it.

Problem: The house is a mess today and I can't and shouldn't clean it all myself.

Solution: A Housework Scavenger Hunt!

(We earn stickers for chores that later transfer into quarters.)

Here are the clues:
 We’ll start in a place where we like to hang out.

Reading and piano are what this room's about.

Let’s go to a room where we all like to sit.

We brush, wash, and ‘go’ there. Can you think of it?

Now let’s collect yucky stuff all over the house.

We need to get it out before it attracts a mouse!

Let’s go to the room that is mostly clean in part.

Just clutter from projects and animals and art.

Now each of you start on the room where you dress.

Pick up 30 things each while I sweep up this mess.

We’ll go back to bedrooms after piano lessons are done.

For now get 2 stickers and then go have some fun.

 Ok, let’s get back to the place where we drop

Shoes, backpacks, mittens, lunchboxes, papers and socks.

Now that that’s finished, who’s up for a race?

Get an old rag and let’s mop this whole place.

Let’s straighten the room with the big fireplace.

It shouldn’t take long, there’s not much out of place.

Now let’s finish up where you lay down your heads.

If we get it sparkling we can rearrange some beds.

While we are here, let’s straighten another little room.

It’s hardly a mess and does not need a broom.

I think we are almost done with our chores.

Put up 2 more stickers, then put clothes in your drawers.

You were such a big help, I couldn’t have done it without you!

Please go eat a popsicle as my way of saying THANK YOU!!

Good luck with your summer ideas!  I'll be posting lots more ideas, so check back often.
Thanks for reading,

Cathy

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Parenting Tip - Have a More Meaningful Mothers Day

I hate Mother's Day.  I know, I know. I'm horrible.  I don't mind honoring MY mother, of course-- she's one in a million.  It's all the attention I feel like I'm getting, but not deserving and I would just rather hibernate until the day is over.

But this year, I would like you to visit the Arizona American Mother's blog.  Tamara Passey, 2013 Young Mother of the Year, is posting ideas each day that will help you make Mother's Day a little more meaningful in your life.

Go check it out!

Thanks for reading,
Cathy 



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Parenting Tip - Stop It!

I recently saw an old clip of Bob Newhart.  His patient was telling him that she was terrified of being buried alive in a box.  She went on and on about her fears and how they were restricting her activities and causing her problems.

Bob then replied that he could cure her with two words:  STOP IT!  He told her to stop thinking about being buried alive.  Stop thinking about her fears.  That was it.  Case closed.  She would be cured if she would just STOP IT. Well, naturally, she wasn't sold on his advice.

This made me think about how many times I would tell my children to stop it.  Stop being so noisy, stop leaving your clothes on the floor, stop fighting with your brother, stop complaining.  You get the idea.....But did it work?  Did they STOP?  No, of course not.

I think that in order to stop something, you have to start something else.  You have to replace the wrong behavior with a better behavior.  Instead of telling your child to stop being noisy, ask him if he can whisper quieter than you can or ask him funny questions in a whisper so he has to listen carefully to hear you.  Instead of telling your children to stop leaving their clothes on the floor, tell them to start hanging them on the spiderman hook you just bought and hung up or start putting their dirty clothes in the flower laundry basket in their room.

If you're in the car, instead of telling your children to stop fighting, ask them to start counting how many white cars they see driving down the street.If you're home and they're fighting, ask them to count how many windows are in your whole house.

Get it?  Distract them from the wrong thoughts, behaviors and actions and give them new actions, thoughts and things to do.  You can't take away something --without replacing it with something else;  that would be negative space, a black hole, a void.

It works for adults too.  I'm going to STOP wasting time on the computer.  Instead, I will make a list of things I need/want to do and look at the list when I have a few moments to kill.

So my advice, Bob Newhart, would be to START IT! 

Thanks for reading,

Cathy

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Music Tip - Practice Ideas

I asked my piano moms for ideas they use to successfully get their children to practice during the summer.  Here's some of their responses:

My son says "knowing that I'll get (computer) game-time after I practice and that I won't get bothered about it the rest of the day and that I can play at friends' houses" is what motivates him.

My son seems to practice on his own without much encouragement, but that's probably because he loves it, and because we're in the routine of him doing it right after breakfast, and he knows that play time (or whatever he wants to do) comes AFTER piano practice is finished.

Currently we have a small box on the piano that holds our squeakies. They are small rubber figures. Each song they play well, they pick one and if they complain I get to pick one.  At the end of the lesson we have a squeakie war where we just play make believe war, but the toys don't leave the piano since they get lost if we do! Then after all my men have been killed/ no more than 5 mins. We put them back for the next day. Squeekies came in a 12 pack at Walmart and I will use my Micheals coupon to get them for a better deal. 

I do use TV in the summer since we don't watch it much during the school year, especially on school days.  If I really want to make it worth their while I promise to pop popcorn and we all watch an Andy Griffith together.  

The best thing for us is to pick a time each day and stick to that time.

The boys get 20 minutes of computer time each, every day, but they don't get it until after they do their piano practice. So I don't have to keep telling them to practice because they tell me "I'm going to practice now so I can do my computer time."

We do our piano, reading, learning games (and chores) all in the morning during the summer time. The reward is they can either watch a movie or have video game time in the early afternoon. This structure has worked fairly well for all age groups and we've used it over quite a few summers. :-)

1st- We TRY (the optimal word) to get our music done EARLY in the day. That way there's no drama during the normal late afternoon drama.

2nd-  I do the "Ms. Cathy cup game"  with a sweet tart under one.  This really works WONDERS, and helps me keep my cool.  (Although one time I got so frustrated I picked up the cup and ate it right in front of my child..that showed him....not). [side note: The Ms. Cathy game consists of hiding a sticker under one bell out of 5-6 bells sitting on the piano.  The student plays a tricky section and rings a bell.  If the sticker is not under that bell, the student keeps playing the section and ringing bells until he finally finds the correct bell.  The students LOVE this game]

Practice before breakfast!

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Did you notice how most every one mentions practicing early in the day and making it a routine?  I think that is the key--consistency and putting it before play/tv/computer time.

Some kids are starting back to school in a couple of weeks and others of you around the country are still enjoying summer.  No matter what your schedule though, some of the above ideas will continue to work.  If they don't, analyze your new routines, find out the best time for piano practicing, and make it work.  You'll be so glad you did as you raise a brighter, more caring child.

                                                    Well, I didn't say they wouldn't still be silly!

Thanks for reading,
Cathy
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Parenting Tip -You are an Artist!

I listened to an interesting podcast today about the stained glass artist, Tom Holdman.   He is a young man who has created and made stained glass windows for LDS temples, Catholic churches, commercial buildings, residences and public art projects. What fascinated me the most about him though, was that he has a speech impediment.  And it was that disability that has shaped him into what he has become today. 

 

As I read more about Tom and his work with stained glass, I was amazed at how many thousands of small pieces of glass go into each window.  I thought of the hours and hours of time it took to work with so many pieces of glass to create a work of art.

 

I think that is one of the reasons we are fascinated and in awe of artists---at least that is why I am.  It not only takes talent, but it takes time and patience to create art.  Any art. 

 

I’m interested in quilting.  That medium uses many small pieces of fabric that are sewn together to create a beautiful masterpiece.   A great painting contains hundreds of strokes of paint.  A symphony is composed of note after note after note to make a beautiful harmonic masterpiece.

 

All great art takes time, patience and the willingness to let the work evolve into a creation of its own.

 

Mothers are artists.  We help create people.  We spend hours, weeks and years teaching and loving and showing patience through many small pieces of daily experiences.  We watch and wonder as our work of art begins to emerge into a beautiful masterpiece.

 

Do we view ourselves as artists or as bored and tired wives and mothers?  An artist works many hours alone with his project.  There is no one encouraging him while he is working laboriously and sometimes tediously on each project.  It is only at the unveiling that he is rewarded with the praise he deserves.

 

So it is with mothers.  Day in and day out we change diapers, cook meals, wash clothes and listen to whining children.  There is no one there to give us a high five and say “good job, Mom!”  But if we’re patient, if we keep in our mind’s eye the long range goal, and if we enjoy the small moments of each day, then we, too, will receive the praise and reward we deserve when our project is finished (is it ever finished?).

 

If we think of ourselves as artists, our daily struggles will seem more glamorous.  If we think of ourselves as artists we will view our “work” as a creative endeavor. If we think of ourselves as artists, we can enjoy the journey and feel gratitude for the magnificent work we have been entrusted with.